Why Self-Care Actually Leads to Abundance

Did you know that a dedicated practice of self-care can actually lead to more abundance?

abundance - jianiteo websiteApproximately 10 years ago (before I even knew about the Law of Attraction, manifestation, and abundance), I suffered from a very unhealthy habit known as “self-sacrifice”.

I was good at “giving to others” but not so good at “receiving for myself”.

As a result, I was stressed-out, burnt-out and energetically depleted more often than not.

AND, because I wasn’t consistently taking care of myself, I wasn’t able to foster, build, and grow the energy I needed to attract what I wanted with ease.

As I started to learn about the various energetic laws of the Universe, I realized that by NOT taking care of myself I was inadvertently blocking abundance from coming into my life!

Did you know that there are actually spiritual laws of the universe that aid us ALL in manifesting and attracting what we desire?

AND, did you know that the practice of self-care can greatly enhance this ability?

Over the years, I’ve learned a lot about these energetic & spiritual laws and found that there are 3 main components of abundance that must be considered for a person to manifest with more ease and grace.

To help you learn how self-care can actually lead to abundance I’d like to share with you these 3 main components of abundance that I’ve learned, which are as follows:

  1. Your ability to receive. This represents your willingness to receive abundance with gratitude and grace (instead of resistance and unworthiness). With this ability in place you are energetically telling the Universe that you are “worthy” of abundance instead of resisting it’s efforts to bring you what you desire. For example, if someone gave you a compliment, a gift, or a monetary offering would you accept with gratitude and grace? Or would you feel resistant to accepting that gift because you’re worried that the other person wants something in return. Or concern that the compliment, gift, or offering they are giving you is “too much”?
  2. Your ability to build & sustain. This represents your ability to foster, build, and grow any abundance that comes your way. Without this level of self-discipline in place you are energetically telling the Universe that you only want abundance if it’s “easy”. Although manifesting and attracting CAN be easy, it often requires at least some amount of dedication, desire, and effort on your part to for the Universe to know that you are not taking your abundance lightly. For example, are you squandering the abundance (whether it be time, energy, or money) you attract thoughtlessly? Or do you have a schedule, a budget, an investment plan, or a practice of self-care & discipline that helps you build and sustain any abundance you’ve received?
  3. Your ability to reciprocate. This represents your ability to reciprocate and give back others in some way. It also represents your willingness to give back to yourself! It’s important to note that this does NOT need to be immediate reciprocation upon receiving abundance, but rather something that allows you “to pay forward” the abundance you’ve received at a future date and time to a future recipient. This gift could be in the form of time, energy, or money and because the Universe abhors a void, this willingness to pay it forwrad can make you more magnetic to future forms of abundance that come your way.

When we practice all 3 of these components regularly in our life (as it relates to our time, our energy, or our money) it becomes much easier for us to manifest and attract what we desire!

So, why does self-care actually lead to abundance?

First, a self-care practice meets all 3 of the components related to abundance so that you can manifest with more ease and grace!! Here’s why:

  • Self-care represents your willingness to receive your own self-love, health & harmony into your life.
  • Self-care can be a daily/weekly/monthly practice of self-discipline that represents your willingness to foster, build, & grow that self-love, health & harmony.
  • Self-care is the ultimate gift you can give to yourself because it represents your willingness to reciprocate and give back to yourself.

With all of the above in place, not only will you feel great about yourself, your health, AND your life but you will also be activating the Law of Attraction with a much higher vibration and frequency in place!

Which of course, is what leads to our ability to manifest and attract with EASE. ๐Ÿ™‚

Second, self-care is nurturing and “feminine” in nature, which is greatly needed to balance all of the “masculine” energy (“doing”, taking action, prioritizing,ย  etc..) we as humans need to employ in order to meet our daily tasks, priorities, and obligations.

With women especially, operating in our masculine energy all the time can be highly draining and exhausting. A regular self-care practice offsets all the energy we’re putting out and refuels our body, mind, & spirit, allowing us to be more feminine in nature AND even more effective when we do need to be in our masculine energy!

AND, this feminine energy is what allows to just “be” in the moment more easily, helps us go with the flow, has an energy of “allowing” (vs. forcing), and it encourages creativity which are ALL huge components to attracting abundance with more ease!

Third, self-care = self-love, which is considered to be the highest frequency and emotional experience available to us as humans.

In fact, love also vibrates at the same frequency as gratitude which ties in to our ability to “receive” more readily the gifts that each life experience brings.

Not only that, but self-love has the ability to heal old emotional wounds, allows us to have more compassion and patience others, and is ultimately what will result in a change in our external world.

WHY? Because your external world is always a reflection for what’s going on inside. Remember, according to the Law of Attraction, “like attracts like”. ๐Ÿ™‚

To see if self-care actually can lead to more abundance for YOU (whether it be more self-love, prosperity, health, happiness, joy, etc…!), consider implementing the following:

  • Pay attention to your willingness to 1) receive, 2) build/foster/grow, and 3) reciprocate in ALL areas of your life for a period of 1-2 weeks. If you find that one of the 3 components is regularly NOT in place, create and implement a simple self-care ritual that will foster/build/grow that missing area for a month and see what changes.
  • Notice how much time you spend in both “masculine” and “feminine” energy mode to see if there’s an imbalance. Free up some time in your schedule so that you can incorporate more “feminine” energy activities (i.e. these would be activities that energize, inspire, delight, empower, or allow you to be more creative!) to balance out all the “masculine” activities that you engage in.
  • On a scale of 1-10 (with 10 being extraordinary), rate how much you LOVE yourself. If it’s less than a 10, determine the #1, simplest thing you could do to create change in that area & turn it into a self-care practice for ONE month.

At the end of one month, notice any new forms of abundance that arise in your life as a result of these changes! ๐Ÿ™‚

If you’re diligent with these recommendations, you’ll likely notice a difference in how you’re feeling AND how you’re attracting.

Imagine… how much easier would it be to manifest, attract, and create what you desire if you truly loved your self, your health, & your life?!

Self-care is the answer. ๐Ÿ™‚

Jess Bonasso, otherwise known as The Self Care Goddess, empowers others to LOVE them SELF, their HEALTH, and their LIFE!

For more information, click HERE to learn about Jess OR call 720-333-6796 TODAY to schedule a *COMPLIMENTARY* Self Care Wellness Consult!

To receive daily inspiration on how to LOVE your SELF, your HEALTH, and your LIFE, be sure to follow me on social media! ๐Ÿ™‚

Like us on Facebook View our profile on LinkedIn Follow us on TwitterView our videos on YouTube


Creating Harmony in Relationships

What You SowWouldn’t it be great & so much EASIER if we could all just get along without even trying? ๐Ÿ™‚

And why does it require SO much effort to work through conflict & maintain harmony?

I’ve had many relationships in my life with friends, family, & significant others and I can’t think of a single one when conflict didn’t arise at some point in the relationship.

You see, we’re ALL human. ย 

Misunderstandings happen. Things are misinterpreted. People get triggered & lash out. Needs go unidentified & unmet. Promises get broken. Feelings get hurt.

Even though we all make mistakes & are doing the best we can in any given moment, the sad reality is that most of what we’ve been taught about how to get along we learned from watching others!ย 

Think about it… it’s not like this was taught as an on-going class in school or anything.

AND, without appropriate mentors to model & guide ourselves after, we’ve mostly just learned how to react unconsciously to conflict, leading to animal-like behavior & a variety of well-learned bad habits.

According to David B. Wolfe, the author of Relationships That Work, this kind of modeling can result in any number of the following bad habits & roadblocks to creating harmony: ย 

  • advising
  • judging
  • moralizing
  • giving solutions
  • warning
  • threatening
  • interrogating
  • probing
  • preaching
  • teaching
  • lecturing
  • ordering
  • directing
  • scolding
  • diverting
  • distracting
  • analyzing
  • interpreting
  • criticizing
  • name-calling
  • labeling
  • sympathizing
  • reassuring
  • praising

How many of these do YOU regularly engage in OR receive these from others? ย 

I will admit there are times that I still have a hard time giving AND receiving some of these especially when I’m emotionally triggered, physically drained, or under attack.

That being said, I’ve learned a few things along the way to avoid engaging in these behaviors that I think will help YOU avoid doing the same so that you can get along better with others. ๐Ÿ™‚

In part, I believe a very important aspect of creating harmony in relationship lies in understanding the 3 modes of expression, which are as follows & embody the following qualities:


  • scared
  • insecure
  • nervous
  • inhibited
  • anxious
  • self-deprecating
  • weak
  • fragile
  • indecisive


  • bold
  • confident
  • considerate
  • secure
  • empathetic
  • straightforard
  • honest
  • courageous
  • open-minded


  • abrasive
  • cocky
  • harsh
  • bully
  • arrogant
  • insensitive
  • loud
  • obnoxious
  • selfish

In my opinion, it’s obvious that assertiveness is the healthiest form of expression to use when working to create harmony & resolve conflict with others.

Why? Because theย emotional vibrational of this mode of expression literally feels the best when given AND received!

So here’s the million-dollar question you might be asking… “HOW do I become more assertive?!”

I believe that answer lies in the following daily spiritual rituals & practices that you can engage in anywhere, anytime, & even when conflict is NOT present to foster greater assertiveness & harmony in your relationships:

  1. Practice genuine, open-minded curiosity as much as possible & especially when triggered. Doing this with everyone you meet & engage with will recondition you to access this skill during difficult, triggered moments. Ask LOTS of open-ended questions to gain information so that you can increase your understanding of what’s driving the other person. This elicits a form of listening that has the desire to understand driving it vs. the desire to fix a problem or defend one’s stance & will deepen your connection & interactions with others deeply! Last but not least, do this BEFORE you offer up an explanation of your stance so that the other person feels deeply heard & understood, resulting in a diffusion of whatever reaction they might’ve been having and making them more open to hearing your perspective.
  2. Understand & clarify your triggered emotional responses as they arise. Understanding what you do & do NOT want is a critical component to arrive at a WIN-WIN solution, for expressing your truth, & for asking for what you need. To do this, try the following non-violent communication technique when you experience any dis-empowering response (in yourself or others):
    • Step back in a non-biased way & observe the situation at hand.
    • Identify clearly any dis-empowering emotions being felt (you might have to use #1 to find out!).
    • Identify clearly what needs are not being met that would cause that type of emotional response (for example, if you’re angry because your spouse didn’t help out around the house like they said they would, the need that went unfulfilled might be a need for trust & integrity).
    • Fulfill the need by filling it yourself (when applicable) or making a request of others by explaining your emotion, what it is you REALLY want, & asking if they would be willing to help fulfill that need.
  3. Treat others the way you wish to be treated.ย What you give, you get. What you send out, comes back. What you sow, you reap. What you see in others, exists in you. If you want harmony in relationships, YOU have to show up & treat others the way you want to be treated! To identify what this looks like for YOU, do the following:
    • Make a list of all the things that trigger you in your interactions with others.
    • For each item on the list, identify how you’d rather be treated instead.
    • Make a commitment to learn how to show up the way you want to be treated.
  4. Speak your truth in a way that honors all involved. Being authentic, honest, genuine & real is important but not at the cost of someone else’s feelings. When you must be honest with someone else about how you feel, do it a compassionate, kind way.
  5. Work toward a WIN-WIN resolution whenever you can. Competition & trying to win over another creates an adversarial energy that rarely ends in a fulfilling resolution. Not to mention that getting everyone’s needs met always feels better in the end. ๐Ÿ™‚
  6. Practice, practice, practice being assertive & learn from your mistakes. Align yourself to the qualities of assertiveness as much as possible & remember that getting really good at something takes time. You will stumble & bumble often in the beginning! Learn from your mistakes. Re-affirm your intentions to be better next time & to become competent in whatever you’re trying to become. With enough practice, you’ll eventually become a master at being assertive!

So there you have it! These are just a few personal insights on how to have harmony in relationships. ๐Ÿ™‚

And please remember that we are all human. If someone does not treat you with the same level of respect as you desire, realize that any of the following might be the reason why:

  • They don’t know what they need or how to ask for it.
  • They don’t know how to be assertive.
  • They are emotionally, physically, or mentally drained & unable to draw upon their assertive resources.
  • There is something in you that’s magnetizing this experience into your reality so that you can learn from it.

At the end of the day, we are ALL doing the best we can in any given moment. Knowing that you’ve made mistakes too, practice forgiveness, compassion & understanding as much as you possibly can.

You’ll have much great harmony & be much happier as a result! ๐Ÿ™‚